Taylor Swift’s ‘Eldest Daughter’ From Life of a Showgirl
I haven’t made it through all of Life of a Showgirl by Taylor Swift yet, but Eldest Daughter is easily my favorite so far. The track hit me so deeply that I asked Adam to pause what he was doing and listen to it with me. What followed was one of those deep conversations you don’t expect but really needed.
Very few people know my story, but this song had me reflect on pieces of it I’ve carried for a long time...
As the eldest daughter of my generation on both sides of my big Indian family, I know what it’s like to be the one who goes first, the “first lamb to the slaughter,” the one expected to carry traditions, hold it together, and set an example. I learned young how to put on a facade, be strong, polished, and unshaken, even when I was unraveling inside. Doing it wasn’t about choice. It was about survival.
And yet, in my immediate family, I was also the younger sibling between my brother and me. The duality of it all shaped me. Eldest in one world and youngest in another. Either way, it meant being held to impossible standards while also feeling invisible, juggling the pressure of expectations while aching as I was easily overlooked.
My takeaway at this point in my life is resilience. I learned how to lead and how to observe. I learned that I could be both unyielding and empathetic, both the protector and the one who still needed protection. And slowly, I’ve come to understand that “home” isn’t something I have to earn through perfection, validation, or approval. Home is in the spaces and people where I can finally lay down the armor and just be.
Carrying this facade made me strong from being made to feel weak, but it doesn’t define me anymore. I carry the power to create my own home, in my body, in my voice, and in the life I’m building now.
What’s your favorite song on the new album?